"You seemed smarter than me when I met you." Jeff Winger
"And there's more where that didn't come from!"-Annie
"Oh! Let's not leap to thing doing!"-Troy
"Abed? You know how you wanted me to tell you when you were being scary weird instead of cute weird? This is scary weird."-Annie
"He's shooting lightning and I'm naked!"-Troy
"Uh oh, he's playing the rainman card. Let's bounce."-Pierce
"Alcohol makes people sad. It's like the Lifetime Movie of beverages."-Troy
"Whoa! Whoa! Who taught you therapy, Michael Jackson's dad?!"-Troy
"Kettlecorn! That's a fun time snack!"-Troy
"My name's Abed by the way."-Abed
Abed, nice to know you and then meet you, in that order."-Jeff
"Holy crap. Abed. I see your value now."-Jeff
"That's the nicest thing anyone's ever said to me."-Abed
"9/11 was pretty much the 9/11 of the falafel business."-Abed
"You were on top of the world before and now no one gives a rat's ass."-Pierce
"Am I crumping?"-Abed
"If life is just a series of ridiculous attemts to be alive, you're a hero to everything that's ever lived."-Jeff
"When I put on these skinny jeans, my ass looks like a baby pumpkin."-Pierce
"Love is a gamble, always. But waiting won't change the dice. You either roll them, or you lose your turn."-Shirley
"I beg your Unbelievable pardon?!"-Britta
"Why am I crying? Did I accidentally listen to 'Come Sail Away' by Styx again?"-Troy
"It's called a stress headache, I got my first one when I was four."-Annie
"Speaking as one of the meek, as soon as I inherit the earth, you're a dead man."-Shirley
"Can't I be the friend in the group whose trademark is his well defined boundaries, like Privacy Smurf, Discreet Bear or Confidentiality Spice?"-Jeff
"What are you guys doing out here?"-Troy
"Self actualizing?"-Britta
"Well, it's loud."-Troy
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